Linebarrels Of Iron Episode 12: From The Tropics With Love

December 26, 2008

“Damn you, you monster! How dare you touch my woman!”

Kouichi Hayase, Linebarrels Of Iron Episode 12: From the Tropics With Love


“Green is always bad.”


The episode starts off with Jack Smith, inside what must be the Katou’s mobile base (Shangri-La?) climbing out of some pod-like thing. Presumably it performs repairs on him, since he has both arms back. The first thing he does is to swear revenge on Reiji, but in his anger-filled wall-slam, he hits a button that releases some green liquid into the ocean, which we happen to see some tentacled creature swim right through.


“Okay, I’m going to catch it with my cleavage now!”

With the singing done and dusted, we now go back to the episode. We open with a beach scene where Risako and Makoto pass a beach ball, Ishigami is relaxing, the landlady is cooking up something (yakisoba???), all while the JUDA members look on.

Turns out that Ishigami has secretly called all the Machinae pilots and affliated people here under the guise of a new mission.While Kouichi and Shizuna call foul, Ishigami says that the trip here is to strengthen the bonds between all the core JUDA personnel, as well as something of an off-day. He’s also invited Kouichi’s three friends to join in (Furuya had extra classes, haha). While the group talks, Kouichi pulls Makoto away to inquire about Jinrai, but Makoto brushes it off and after introducing himself to the group, attempts to hook up with Miu. While Shizuna manages to separate them, Makoto misinterprets it as jealously, calling her “bob-cut”. Shizuna kicks that reason to the curb, but not before revealing that her reason for keeping a bob cut was to use the clip that Kouichi gave her.


“That’s right, Ishigami’s Swimwear is now officially open for business!”

The rest of the pilots are happy about being at the beach, but they didn’t bring they swimsuits since they thought that is was a mission. Ishigami has that covered, however; as Makoto distracts a rather-close-to-Ishigami Risako, Kouichi is given a secret order to summon Linebarrel. He does so, but the “Linebarrel” of “Come, Linebarrel” is whispered.

Linebarrel lands on the sand, and the “its JUDA’s transportation and shade device” excuse is given to a freaked-out Risako. Linebarrel then pops its cockpit open, revealing a ton of swimwear (that Maki, ground operative for JUDA) packed) for the crowd to pick. Rachel is less than thrilled, however, realizing that Linebarrel kicked up a huge cloud of sand when it touched down.



Kouichi and Makoto, hauling things around, happen to overhear the girls and their talk during their clothing change. Blood loss through nasal cavity ensues.


“Get out of the damned picture, Izuna!”

While the two sit on the shoreline and discuss Furuya’s misfortune, Makoto asks which one would Kouichi prefer; Risako or Emi? Kouichi skirts around the question, but Makoto’s inquiry is cut short when Risako appears to drag Kouichi off to her side, completely oblivious to the fact the Kouichi is in danger of losing blood again in the process. Makoto eggs Risako on, but then the rest of the JUDA girls (and one shota Izuna) approach the group, ending Risako’s monopolizing attempt. Their main goal here is to show off Emi, however, and it’s working rather excellently.


“Er… pettan, pettan, tsurupettan?”

That is, until Yamashita and twin lolis Rachel and Shizuna walk up, and completely bowl Kouichi over with Yamashita in a bikini, making Risako realize that she has her job cut out for her.

Over on the island’s opposite side, JUDA crewmembers are loading stuff onto their mobile base while Yuriannu suntans. Sawatari calls for a swim with Dimitriv, but he goes old-school all over Sawatari, while Jack hunts for something deep on the island.

Over on the JUDA side, Rachel is spoofing Reiji while it’s her turn to split watermelons. Yamashita laments the unavailability of Reiji, but after some discussion is decided that Reiji is better off attending to his missions.


“Thus I call… the Art of the Melon!”

Meanwhile Kouichi is sitting on a rock, staring out at the sea, all the while wondering who would be better; Risako, or Emi? Fortunately, Emi who has just found him, is a poor reader of facial expressions, and Kouichi’s “who’s boobs are bigger fantasy” look is largely ignored. Kouichi attempts to divert the rather uncomfortable atmosphere, but there’s no need to; Emi is here to thank him for his efforts during the last episode.

The two nearly kiss but for Makoto, who turns up just behind the rock in his search for Kouichi to help with dinner. Kouichi leaves first, leaving Emi to ponder about… well, something, unaware that something is stalking her.

Jack is still wandering around the island cutting tentacle-shaped… tentacles, saying something about having to hurry. I guess fans of the US version Godzilla here can start to relate to things already…

In JUDA’s island house for the people on the island (:-???), Risako and the Endo twins are helping prepare dinner ingredients. While they marvel at Risako’s culinary skill, they also uncover a secret; while embarrassed with matters regarding Kouichi, she works three times as fast. All this is wasted on Jack who’d just stumbled on the house, who has eyes only for Risako.

Meanwhile, Miu and Rachel are out gathering wood for the barbeque at night when they realized that Yamashita is gone. Before they can make an attempt to search, however, two slimy tentacles reach out and grab them off to some unknown place.

Ishigami is also somewhere deep into the island, but he’s on a cliff visiting a grave. Katou is also there, but he’s there for one more reason; to add Riku’s name to what appears to be a mass-tomstone for deceased Katou members. Katou says that he will carry Riku’s ideals along with his own, and when Ishigami asks if the cost of the actions are irrelevant, Katou replies that to stop when there are already too many who have dedicated themselves to the cause would be tantamount to dishonouring them. Katou tells Ishigami that it’s his last chance to return to the Katou Organization, but Ishigami simply ignores it.

Meanwhile, the rest of the people on the JUDA side are worried about the loss of Miu, Yamashita, Rachel, and even Kizaki. Makoto splits up the team; Risako, Kouichi and Makoto will search one direction, while the Endo twins go another. Yui can wait on the shore. During the search, Risako attempts to look brave for Kouichi but fails miserably, and realizes that Kouichi has grown up without her noticing.

Meanwhile, Katou and Ishigami are having a verbal standoff on that cliff. Katou says that Ishigami is wasting away in his current life, but Ishigami counters that he believes that even without sacrifices, he will change the world.

Meanwhile, Kouichi has found Emi; or rather, her bikini. While Risako is worried about the lack of a person, Kouichi is more worried about a naked Emi, earning him a slap.

The Endo twins are having a lot less moments on their search, until they enter a cave. While Izuna advocates pulling out for the moment, Shizuna decides to forge inwards. Izuna, however, is ambushed by a waiting person, who just turns out to be Yuriannu; the two face down and it comes to blows.

Yui, who is still waiting, is alerted by the dog acting weird; and then the tentacles strike again! This time, her scream is loud enough that Kouichi’s group heard it, but just before they can react, Risako is struck by the tentacles too. Kouichi and Makoto turn back to save her, but are sprayed with a jet of black liquid.


“Now… let us begin.”

Not even Yuriannu, in the midst of starting her shota-raep after beating down Izuna, is spared the tentacles, nor bob-cut Shizuna in the middle of the cave. Kouichi and Makoto finally clear their vision enough to realize that the monster, which just so happens to turn out to be a gigantic squid, has every girl on the island in its hands. Kouichi, despite massive blood loss, proclaims his attempt to save Emi, but his summoning of Linebarrel is stopped untimely by his lack of blood.

No worries, though, as Samurai Jack (Smith) is here to save the day! Needless to say, the first to get help is Risako, but all the other girls are freed pretty quickly as well. Emi is left in mid-air, and Kouichi recovers fast enough to sprint forward and get her while Jack finished off the giant squid and leaves. Risako realizes that that’s where his feelings lie, but his efforts are slightly watered-down by a now complete-for-viewing Emi, who gives him a tight slap. Done and dusted, the JUDA group head back to dinner, but they encounter a sheepish-looking Izuna who can’t really answer the question of “where were you?”.

The Katous are having their own beach barbecue with a full-meat course, with questions of “where did you get the meat?” largely ignored since the meat tastes good. Jack gives a silent prayer to the giant squid’s sacrifice.

The JUDA members are having their dinner on the opposite side; Ishigami and Makoto talk, Yamashita collects a seashell for Reiji, the rest are eating, but Kouichi and Risako are absent.



Kouichi himself is sitting behind the same rock lamenting the latest slap, and Risako is there to get him to eat something. However, Kouichi, weak from “blood loss”, accidentally pulls her on top of him, and Risako, going with the moment, kisses him.

Cut to Mr. Kiriyami, where he’s making a phone call with sinister intentions.

Another anime-exclusive episode, this one dedicated to parodying 18+ anime. Shota, Fanservice, reap, tentacled raep… well, actually that’s all, but let me play it up a bit.

Well, not much to be said; it’s not that bad, but with the ending, we can look forward to a betrayal real soon. Whether Makoto will be in it or not, however, remains to be seen.

Also, watch out for the 14th episode. If they change OPs or EDs, it might mean that Gonzo is stopping at 26 episodes. It’s just speculation, however, so don’t get your hopes up or be sobbing all over the keyboard yet.



  1. The 5th and 6th pics are gd enough for me. XD

  2. Actually, Yamashita is _not_ a girl. The manga version of this incident makes it extremely clear that Shizuna’s presentation of Yamashita in bikini was a _joke_, and one that Izuna apparently did not appreciate, given that his response was to yell at Shizuna that her jokes were too over-the-top and that Yamashita should be embarrassed to be dressed like that.

    Then, of course, there’s the fact that “Satoru” is a boy’s name, and that when Ishigami formally introduced Yamashita (vol 2, page 86) he used the masculine third-person pronoun, “kare.” (“Soshite, kare ga Yamashita-kun da”)

    Lack of bulge? Google “how to tuck.”

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